Thursday, July 9, 2009

Happy Days Are Here Again

Today is really the first day that I have felt good since my last treatment. I am going to go ahead and plan about 6 days recovery for each treatment and try to stop hoping that it will get easier next time. This whole process definitely sucks, but it isn't unmanageable. One bad week, two good weeks x 8. Well, then all the stuff that will follow, like surgery and radiation..... But let's just concentrate on getting over the first big chemo hurdle first. Two good weeks and then a bad week x 6 to go. It's easy to be optimistic and positive and see the big picture when I'm feeling good, but the bad week really sucks. I am not fun to be around (sorry family!). I tried to keep a journal this time so that I can track what medicine I'm taking and how I'm feeling every day. One crappy aspect of the side effects of chemo is that I seem to experience a shitty roller coaster ride of different types of pain and discomfort throughout the bad week. Do I hope that the next 6 treatments are similar to my experience as the first 2? I guess I hope that I am learning what to expect yes, it would be nice to be able to predict how I'll be feeling in the days after my treatment. Good thing that the drugs they give me are helpful in controlling all of the fun things that go along with chemo!
Kim was here from Saturday night until early Wednesday morning. We had a great visit despite my not feeling well! She and Annabel really enjoy each other's company and I love having my sister around. She said it was like old times when we lived together, but I think her memory is clouded. Well, unless she was throwing shoes at me when I was passed out. That would be like the old times that I remember!
I hadn't planned to need help on Wednesday, but I was still in a lot of pain on Tuesday, so Scott's Mom came up. I am so grateful to her for coming up here and taking care of us. On Wednesday afternoon, we went back to the wig shop with Audrey (my wig, that is her style name). I finally took her back to get the bangs trimmed and I am much much happier with the wig now. I wore it to Walmart after it got all shined up! I felt a lot less self conscious that I thought I would, but also, I was in Walmart. We had a nice day yesterday and I was glad to get out of the house.
So today was the first day that Annabel and I have been on our own in a week. Annabel woke up early this morning (2nd time in 2 days, please don't be a trend!). We had breakfast and the weather was pretty mild, but cloudy. We went to the park at about 9 and played on the playground for about an hour. I loaded her up in the stroller to go to the zoo, but it wasn't open yet, so we came back home. I have been relaxing or napping while Annabel naps. We had a good afternoon and then I went to bunko happy hour when Scott got home. I wore the wig! I had a great time catching up with everyone. And not worrying (too much) about the wig. When I got home, I let Annabel color on my fuzzy head with her bathtub crayons. She thought it was hilarious, which cracks me up. She is a funny, funny girl.
Scott and Annabel and I are looking forward to a visit to Knoxville this weekend. We are going to see Sonic Youth on Friday night and then spend the rest of the weekend at my Dad's visiting.
Tonight's pictures....Scott and I (with wig)......& Annabel expressing her love for tapioca pudding.

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